Sunday, September 9, 2007

To Sum up What's wrong with me.........

For those who don't know, here is my story.
About 16 months ago, after being with my husband for 7 years (married 2 of them) we had never gotten PG and had never ever used protection. (I've pretty much had irregular periods my whole life, and just assumed that was normal for me. None of my doctors ever really seemed super concerned. ) One night while doing some BD'ing, something felt wrong, and turns out there was something very wrong!! I had a huge clot, larger than a saucer, come out of me, followed by uncontrollable bleeding. Every time I tried to stand up it would poor out of me. I was soaking thru supers and pads every 30 mins and my husband was begging to take me to the hospital. I flat out refused as I wasn't letting some strange ER Dr. I didn't even know start messing with me. The next day it had started to lighten up a bit, enough to where I didn't feel as though it were life or death anyways. About a week later I was Finally able to get in to see a new OB/GYN (a she, which made me feel at ease), had me go for labs, started me on Provera, which just as I was about to STOP bleeding, Provera MADE ME START BLEEDING AGAIN!! I think in all I bled for almost 7 weeks......... it was horrible. I was exhausted and anemic! My GYN also sent me for a trans vag ultrasound as well, which is when I finally got my diagnosis of PCOS. FINALLY a reason why my stinkin' body is doing the things it is doing!!!!!!!

We managed my period with Provera every 30 days, and about 3 months later we tried 50 mg of Clomid, which I believe never worked as I never got a + OPK or a BFP. We did the clomid thing for 5 cycles, unmonitored by my GYN, (I honestly didn't know any better that I should have been monitored). Finally when I went back to her in January, we talked, I cried, and we decided that I should be referred on to an RE d/t lack of progress and my age is a factor as well (then 34, now 35).

She sent me to a great RE who I really like who seems pretty thorough as well. Insists on monitoring etc. He changed me to 1500 mg Metformin ER and that has pretty much regulated my cycles now, (I think I only missed AF one month, but at that time was going thru some pretty horrible family tragedies so I think stress kept AF away).

I had some delay's getting my Husband to do his one little part in having an SA done. He kept procrastinanting ( I think that he was a tiny bit afraid that he might be the cause of our troubles as well as he did some naughty stuff way back in his past). I had to finally lay it all out on the line with him, and it took me cancelling a f/u with my RE for him to get the test done. Turns out my DH has super swimmers (217 million pre-wash)...... great morph and motility--- so he's definately not the problem.

The day I got his #'s back, I think I hit one of my low's. It was such a blow to me, like someone had totally knocked the wind out of my sails....... right there, plain and simple on paper, I AM THE ONE WHO IS BROKEN. I AM THE REASON WE HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO HAVE BABIES!!!!! I spent 1/2 a day in bed crying, w/ my husband consoling me, and got back up, dusted myself off and faced the world again.

We returned to the RE in July, where we made a plan................
okay-- this blog has become really long so I'll start another one with Augusts' plan after this.

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